Ashia Ray [they/them]
Ashia Ray is the Head Custodian of Infodumpery at Raising Luminaries, helping caregivers juggle advocacy and care work without losing their marbles.
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DISMANTLING SUPREMACY SERIES
Who Gets Hurt When You Over-Work?
Accountability group & family discussion prompts for raising the next generation of kyriarchy-smashers.
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Posts may contain affiliate links and sponsorships, which allow me to earn a commission at no extra cost to you.
Welcome to the Dismantling Supremacy Discussion Series
In this Collab Lab discussion series, we talk about supremacy culture and our responsibility to examine it within ourselves and our communities.
Connecting individual struggle & systemic inequality
Work Ethic, Hustle & Pacing
This work is best done in community: Join the Winter Incubator and Summer Luminator for space to work through this together.
In the Collab Lab, we’re connecting to pick our battles with intention. Let’s examine how our compulsion to over-work causes harm to those we hold power over.
What stories did you grow up with about the value of hustle and ‘hard work?’
- How did the adults in your life talk about work?
- What were the unspoken judgements about those who didn’t work, or didn’t work ‘hard enough?’
- Did you grow up seeing a connection between being ‘good’ and working? How about over-working?
When have you felt compelled to hustle or over-work?
- What are you afraid could happen if you paced yourself, or stopped working entirely?
- How do you benefit from being able to produce under capitalism?
- How are you harmed by failing to set sustainable boundaries about work?
How do you harm others by over-working?
- Who benefits when you normalize over-working? Who is harmed?
- Who relies on you to be well-rested and think strategically?
- When have you chosen to care through ‘acts of service’ without being asked to?
- How have you let resentment, exhaustion, lashing-out, and sloppy mistakes hurt someone you care about?
How do you model sustainable work with your kids?
- What labels have you used to categorize ‘lazy’ people versus ‘hard workers’ in your family?
- How do your actions demonstrate the value of work in your family compared to the value of rest and pacing?
- How do you actively model sustainable pacing and rest?
Commit to Action: Developing Policy, Practice & Relationships
What POLICY will you follow to develop that skill?
Example: Checking in with an accountability partner before committing to another initiative.
How can you PRACTICE this policy – starting today?
Example: Writing an email to a collaborator about options for releasing a task that has become toxic or unsustainable.
What RELATIONSHIPS will you strengthen?
Example: Agreeing with a colleague to check in with each other when you recognize you’re taking on too much.
Relevant Resources
- Join the Winter Incubator – where we dig deeper into hustle culture and transform our approach from the inside out
- Join the Summer Luminator to identify the work that’s burning you out, create more effective ways to show up, and pace your activism, parenting, and career for deep impact.
- Pick Your Battles (And Put Some Back) Collab Lab discussion
JOIN US
PARTNERS IN CAHOOTS
ACCOUNTABILITY
Raising Luminaries is rooted in the unceeded land of the Wampanoag & Massachusett People.
Land acknowledgements are worthless without action. So we prioritize amplifying Indigenous-lead resources in our toolkits and reciprocate with donations to the Wôpanaâk Language Reclaimation Project.
AFFILIATE DISCLOSURE
Ashia Ray & Raising Luminaries are participants in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program and the Bookshop.org Affiliate Program, affiliate advertising programs designed to provide a means for me to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com, Bookshop.com, and affiliated sites.
Photographs via Unsplash & Illustrations via Storyset, used with permission.
©2014-2026 Ashia Ray of Raising Luminaries™. All rights reserved.